Sunday, January 17, 2010

The Sweetest Candy

by Joshua Rainey

Million Dollar Teeth smiled, and his gold teeth shimmered in the buttery light. In his hand was another jar of honey. Albert’s diet consisted solely of honey for the past two months. He vomited the sweet substance, he shit the sweet substance, and he dreamed about the sickening sweet substance.

Mjaltë Më shumë për ju njeri sheqeros.” The huge olive skinned man laughed. Albert didn’t understand a word that had been spoken to him since he had been taken captive.

Another man appeared in the doorway, Babyneck, an immensely fat man with an undulating neck like a baby huddled under his chin. “Si është gjë e ëmbël tona sot?” At that both men laughed.

Million Dollar Teeth set the jar down on the stone floor, and both of Albert’s captors left the room. Albert heard the door being locked and screamed, “What do you want from me, goddammit! Tell me! Someone speak fucking English!” Albert’s voice grew hoarse, and tears streaked his hollowed cheeks.

In the background Albert could hear a buzzing drone that never stopped. It was the bees. They never slept. Albert never slept.

Albert paced his chamber and stared at the amber liquid in the canning jar. They knew that eventually the gaunt American would eat the honey. He always did, it was just a matter of waiting. Albert stared down at his forearms. They were frail. His frame was dwindling. His teeth were loosening. Albert was probably losing his mind.

Hani, ju do të jeni nevojë për fuqinë tuaj.” Albert heard Million Dollar Teeth laugh outside his door. Every night he could hear him and his friends, Babyneck and MGD, playing cards and drinking.

The only light Albert had came from the other side of the glass window of his chamber, and it shone in through a wall of honey jars casting him in amber.

The bees never slept.

Hungry, Albert grabbed the jar and tore off the lid. He reached his curled fingers inside to scoop out the contents. The honey drooled down Albert’s chin and snarled in his chest hair. Albert scooped the liquid into his mouth greedily. Beads of honey had hardened in his hair the length of his naked frame. After two months Albert no longer cared.

Albert knew that soon Million Dollar Teeth would leave him a glass of water under the door. Besides the honey, it was the only nourishment he was allowed.

Albert looked up from his gluttony, and saw his three captors tapping on the glass and laughing. All three were smoking long thin cigarettes.

Ju duken aq i mirë sa mund të hani të gjithë ju lart.” Babyneck chuckled. Albert smiled at the fat man’s neck. He thought that it had to be a growth of some sort.

As quickly as Albert ate the honey it came up in a gut-wrenching wretch. Then everything went black.

Albert slept fitfully. The droning of the bees kept creeping into his mind. When he did awaken Million Dollar Teeth loomed above him. Albert was shackled, hands and feet.

Million Dollar Teeth waved for Albert to stand up.

Sot është ditë e madhe.” He smiled.

Albert stood on shaky legs. Obediently he followed Million Dollar Teeth out of the room, and down a long earthen corridor lit with bare bulbs hung on chains. Million Dollar Teeth whistled a solemn tune that made Albert’s skin crawl.

“Ah, here we are.” The bastard smiled at the trembling American.

They were in a large sparsely furnished room whose only distinguishing piece of furniture was a large rectangular box. The box was a sturdy, clear, plastic box that frightened Albert. Next to the box was an open earthen hole.

“You sonuvabitch.” Albert cried. Tears stained his emaciated cheeks.

“What? You don’t like your new accommodations?” Million Dollar Teeth asked. His voice was cocky and smooth. Albert wanted to punch him, but it took an effort just to remain standing. A part of Albert was relieved just to hear English again.

Albert stared at the box. “No.” He understood this to be his new accommodation, and nearly collapsed. “No!” MGD and Babyneck grabbed Albert by his arms and held him.

“Yes. You see you are going to be a confection of sorts. You are going to be placed in that coffin which we will fill with honey, and in a few years you will be dug up and fed to the rich as a holistic medicine.” Albert struggled to break free but they were too strong for him.

“Goodnight.” MGD said before Albert felt a prick in his arm.


Joshua Rainey lives in WA with his wife Delores and kids Billy, Dream, Sophia, and Aidan. He also has 3 cats Bronson, Cherry Darling, and Gumball. His short story "Scotch on Rocks" was published in Black Petals #42.


Rachel Green said...

Oh! Splendidly creepy.

Cate Gardner said...

Oh good god, I don't think I'll sleep tonight or ever again. Hideous ending (in the best possible way of course).

Jodi Lee (Morrighan) said...

I am never, ever, ever eating honey again. Damn it.

Well done!

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Daniel LeMoal said...

Bravo! My incisors started to ache while I was reading this...

...and is it me, or does that previous anonymous post look like it was left by Million Dollar Teeth?

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